We rented and watched a great movie last night. It was called “The Perks of Being a Wallflower”. It was very interesting. It really made me think about my life and my friends. It made me realize that I used to have the most awesome friends in the world. Somehow, we have lost touch over the years. I miss them. I don’t really have many friends now. I come in contact with many people everyday through work and social activities, but I wouldn’t really call them friends. They are more like acquaintances. You know, things happen in life. People grow up, move away, start families and go on with life. It’s sad that some of the most amazing people that you will ever meet may be the people that you have grown apart from. Maybe I am just in between good friends right now. Maybe there will come a time when I have awesome friends like the ones that I used to have. I sure hope so at least.
Speaking of life going on, I recently found out that after June 30th I will no longer have the best job that I have ever had. The company is cutting back, and my whole department is getting done away with. This has shaken me to the core. I am trying to plan and pay for a wedding. My fiancee needs a new car. I have credit cards to pay off. (Here’s a helpful hint: STAY AWAY FROM CREDIT CARDS!!!) Luckily, my credit card debt is only in the hundreds, not thousands. But that’s neither here nor there. Back to what I was talking about. I have no idea what life will bring next. Where am I going to work? How am I going to pay for all of this? What is going to happen to me and the dreams and plans that I made? Maybe I will use the time between jobs to grow more as a person. Maybe I will take trombone lessons, and finally get back to the level of talent that I once had with that. Maybe I will take drum or piano or guitar lessons like I have always wanted to. Perhaps I shall use the time to do other things I am interested in, like finally getting started on writing the book I keep telling myself and everyone else that I want to write. Heck, I may even write several books, who knows? Something I really need to do is get back into shape. I have also thought about going back to college, and perhaps starting a whole new career. All I know is I am trying my best to trust in God and know that He will provide an answer and a way, just like He always does. I am glad that I served in the military, and have a service-connected disability, because at least that brings some money in.
I am scared as hell, with no clue where my life is going next, but I know in my heart that I am going to be okay.